“The thing is, we will never get better without love. And we will really never get better just loving people like us, or people who agree with us. Instead, we will all sink into our irrational hatred.”
It's 2020 and We Gotta Talk about Meat Sacrificed to Idols
“Now, I admit, I figured as I scanned through this letter a few weeks ago, that this would be a section we would kind of blow past. Who cares about the debate about whether we eat meat sacrificed to idols or not? It is a non-issue today. But as I prepared for this week’s lesson, I could not help but notice that if I substituted “wearing masks” for “eating meat sacrificed to idols”, we had an incredibly applicable passage of Scripture here.”
Did the Romans Swipe Left or Swipe Right?
“And now, in the darkness, having spent the day surrounded by silence, the weight of this transition is sitting heavy on me. I have texted some friends, and in the course of that exchange, I realized how much my pep talks about this pastoral transition sound like eHarmony commercials. I am trying to sell myself on the success and longevity of relationships that start online. And once I made that connection, I could not help but think…
‘Did the people of my congregation swipe left, or swipe right?’”
The System Counts on Your Exhaustion (or Your ADD)
“My father was a plaintiff in a landmark civil rights case in Arkansas 25 years ago.
I always give people a minute to absorb that. Most of my friends have never seen my dad. He was a bit of a recluse, really all my life but definitely after the case. But in case you are looking at me and wondering, yes, he was a white man. And yes, he filed a racial discrimination suit. He was, as far as we could determine, the first person in Arkansas to file racial discrimination… due to association.”
Hearing the Traumatized Voice
“So before we stand in judgement of those who are not speaking, perhaps we instead should get quiet. Perhaps we should listen intently. Perhaps we should seek to hear the whispers of the traumatized voice.”
The Weird Goodbye and the Long Hello
“The truth of the matter is, we cannot predict the emotional and spiritual effect this transition will have on us or on our people. These are untested waters.”
If One More Person Tells Me I Need to Take Care of Myself…
“And yet in this vicious cycle we find ourselves in, well-meaning people keep telling me I need to take care of myself. I know they intend it to be kind and caring, but just telling me to take care of myself at this point is starting to feel like a condescending lecture. Or like they want me to add one more thing to my to do list. Even God’s word is starting to feel condemning. Yeah, I know I need to Sabbath! But who knows what day it is anymore, much less which is the seventh one, and when exactly is all this rest supposed to happen?”
Driving in Dallas (A Metaphor for this Year's Pastoral Transitions)
“There are many skills you pick up as a Dallas driver, but perhaps the most useful was the fine art of hitting the brake and the gas at the same time.”
Buying a Field from Prison
“I am not unique this year. Many of my friends who are in pastoral transitions are confronting realities like this when it comes to where they will live. Some have had Facetime tours of parsonages or homes that they are buying. Several of us have signed leases based on pictures. Some of us have at least seen the outsides of where we are going, and a few have taken masked and gloved tours. But these are all strange leaps of faith we are taking.”
Coping with Change
“As you face any kind of change in your life, be it a very weird pastoral transition like we face this year, or really any significant life altering event, these means of coping will help you make it through. “
Change Reaction
Then the one seated on the throne said, “Look! I’m making all things new.” He also said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.” (Revelation 21:5, CEB translation)
Uh, seriously, God! Do you have to make ALL things new?!?!?! What if I don’t want those words to be trustworthy and true? There are times when I don’t want things to change. I want things to stay old and familiar. Comfortable. Easy.
Hey! Anybody Listening?!?! (aka Pastoral Transitions 2020)
“I was in a meeting of church developers and I raised the question as to what people were doing for pastors transitioning to a new church this year. At first there were crickets. Then someone spoke up and said roughly that they were moving their usual face-to-face meeting to an online option. I pushed back.”
Waking Up Still in the Tomb
“And then, let’s acknowledge that we still need Easter Monday. But maybe instead of needing it to rest and recover, we need it for weeping and gnashing of teeth. We need the space to name for ourselves that this is not how we envisioned serving Christ.”
Scattered
“And that is where Holy Week feels real. It is not in online communion. It is not in watching candles go out. It will not be in listening to ‘Were You There?’ on a YouTube video.
It is in being scattered.”
Expectations
“I can’t see dirt.”
How To Be Engaging Online
“It is gonna feel weird; just acknowledge that to yourself.”
Fully Human
“I think I would rather have a savior who understands the full reality of what it means to try to navigate life in this body that gets tired and leaks from time to time, whether it is convenient or not. A savior who sometimes flips out and flips tables. Part of what is compelling to me about following Christ is that he did experience the pain we do.”
I Am Not Afraid
After I share these insights, person after person has asked me this question: “Has all this given you any insight into what will happen to us in May?” Then they sort of laugh, as if there was any chance that such a thing would be possible. And then I say, “Yes, it has. I am not worried.” That is usually when they look at me like I have lost my mind. And then they want to know why in the world I would say something like that. So here is why.
Temporarily Cained
“Pastors often bemoan how we struggle to get anyone to kneel at the altar and pray, and we know that at least in part that is because people don’t want to announce that they are weak and need help, or to start any rumors about their lives. Social media now exacerbates this pressure to always show a perfect selfie face and a Pinterest worthy house. But I would like to push against those false realities.”
Habit Forming
“We pass things down to our children. Or we do not pass them down. We form habits in our children. Or we break habits. We choose for them what happens with their faith, or what they have to overcome to have faith. We invite our children to stand on the pew next to us and sing hymns and recite creeds, or we send them out of the worship service to play games. We encourage them to put a portion of their allowance in the plate, or we put our hand up and shake our head no to the ushers. And then we bemoan that our children become adults who do not have a foundation of faith to stand on. But we never took the time to pass faith down.”